Blog & Resources

Book Summary for High Performance Relationships now available!

February 29, 2016

A short 6.5 page summary of the High Performance Relationships book is now available! To read more, check it out here: HPR Book Summary.

Surviving the Recession with High Performance Relationships

January 28, 2016

I was excited to have an article published in today’s Globe & Mail! I discussed why relationships are even more important during these times of economic hardship and recession and shared a number of relationship building strategies. The bottom line is that if we want to not only survive professionally and personally during challenging situations of job loss or even retaining our job in a down-sized, higher stress work environment, we need to build our resilience and relationships at work and home.

Read the full article here:

3 Tips for Gaining Media Exposure

January 26, 2016

I was recently asked by one of my fellow Canadian Association of Professional Speakers (CAPS) colleagues, the lovely Patricia Morgan, about how to get media attention.  I am definitely very new to the media game with only a few months of experience but here are three key things I have learned in my short media life.

  1. Be relevant and pitch ideas for presenting your content as it relates to current affairs or upcoming holidays, etc. For example, my tagline / pitch for the media was “Proven relationship strategies that take you from the boardroom to the family room” and then we added …at Christmas, which got a few interviews in December. I also have a Globe and Mail article coming out soon about why strong relationships are critical in the downturn of the economy and tips to build them effectively. Think about how your content could be positioned to help people solve or address issues that are current, relevant and meaningful to them.
  2. Make contact with several media outlets. You can google the contact information for news sources like CBC, Globe and Mail, Breakfast TV, etc. to get names of the producers or media contacts you can pitch there. Or, if you don’t want to do the work to search out the contacts and make cold calls, or have a hard time marketing yourself, as I do, hire a marketing company to help you. I worked with ZG Communications and they used their contact list to send a media kit and pitch the ideas on my behalf.
  3. Prepare. Make sure that you listen to other interviews or read other articles from the media source that you want to target. Get a sense of who their audience is, what they might want to hear from you, and how to communicate in a manner that fits best with that media source.

It takes some work and you have to be okay with some media not seeing your content or approach as a fit, but it is great experience and can help you build your confidence and exposure for future opportunities. I hope this information is helpful as others get their valuable messages out and in the media! I would love to hear tips from others as well so feel free to weigh into the conversation.

Breakfast Television interview re: High Performance Relationships

January 15, 2016

A big thank you to Self Connection Books for hosting my High Performance Relationships book opening party last week with some of my close friends and family. It’s great to have the book completed and I am grateful for the support of so many people along the way! Thank you to Marla Simpson and Mike Finch for hosting the party and to Mike for taking the video of the event!

Click here to hear the interview – sorry for the short ads at the beginning!

Book opening video for High Performance Relationships

November 17, 2015

A big thank you to Self Connection Books for hosting my High Performance Relationships book opening party last week with some of my close friends and family. It’s great to have the book completed and I am grateful for the support of so many people along the way! Thank you to Marla Simpson and Mike Finch for hosting the party and to Mike for taking the video of the event!

360 Feedback – Helpful or Evil?

May 22, 2014

I did a webinar last night for an Executive Coaching program at Royal Roads University and this was the premise of my presentation – is 360 feedback helpful or evil? The question, of course, is more complicated than it seems. What we do know from a meta-analysis of about 3000 studies of performance feedback is that about 1/3 of the time, feedback has the potential to do harm and it actually DECREASES performance, which is rarely the objective that organizations set out to achieve!

I am passionate about making 360 feedback a safe and effective experience that enhances performance – I’ve helped too many organizations over the past 20 years recover from badly implemented 360 programs.  Here is a link to the presentation –  360 Feedback – Helpful or Evil.

In addition, here are some of the answers to questions that came up as a result of the presentation:

1. If an organization is using competencies, do you use these as part of the 360 feedback process?

Yes. It is usually best to ask questions based on the competencies that the organization feels are most important and this then guides development to align with the capabilities identified as most valuable to the organization.

2. Any suggestions for organizations that do use surveys for 360s? (i.e. how to ensure safety in providing feedback using this method)

For organizations that use written surveys  instead of interviews for their 360 process, ensure that you help your client to follow the before and after steps in the 360 process. The 360 survey report is such a small part of the process and the weakest link in ensuring success, oddly enough. What creates greater success and encourages a feedback rich environment is ensuring that the 360 receiver personally invites his/her 360 feedback providers to participate and explains why the feedback is important and how it will be used. What is also important is that the feedback receiver follows up after receiving and integrating the 360 feedback report to thank the feedback providers and let them know what his/her key goals are, which sets expectations of the feedback providers re: what they will see different and gives the feedback receiver an opportunity to invite the feedback providers to continue to give ongoing feedback.

3. Do you follow up with clients at various points post-360 to help ensure they are meeting the objectives in their learning and development plan?

Yes – I believe that the power of the 360 is in the development goals and actions it inspires. Coaching follow-up helps to get the return on the investment of time and energy and money that the feedback receiver, feedback providers, and the organization has put into the 360. Follow-up coaching sessions help to ensure that action is taken.

Reference: Kluger, A. & DeNisi (1996). The effects of feedback interventions on performance: A historical review, meta-analysis and preliminary feedback theory. Psychological Bulletin, 119, 254-285

Team Coaching Around the World

March 4, 2014

I was honoured to be the first presenter this morning at the International Coaching Federation (ICF) Team and Group Coaching Community of Practice. We had participants from all over the world, including Belgium, Bulgaria, France, Canada and the U.S. One of the questions I received was from an international participant who wanted to know how to customize and talk about the Team Coaching System for cultures that are less familiar with team coaching (click on High Performance Team Coaching System for a copy).

One of the customizations we talked about was ensuring that we use the vocabulary that resonates with the participants and the culture in which we are working. So even in North America, where team coaching is getting more established but is still relatively new, I often use the term “Team Effectiveness work” or “Team Development program” when first talking with a client and then slowly weave in the term “team coaching” over time. The key is to start where your client is at and introduce new ideas and concepts over time and in the context and vocabulary that makes sense to them. Thanks for the question!

Key To Successful Relationships?

January 27, 2014

What if the key to successful relationships was straightforward and simple? Maybe not completely easy, but simple. I was reading through my email this morning and came across a comment from someone who was talking about an insight they had in their relationship. I thought it was very profound and I paraphrase and elaborate on it here:

What if the key to our relationships is not about trying to make the other person or even ourselves change?
What if the key to successful relationships is having the courage to say what we need without attacking, blaming, or criticizing?

Imagine what our relationships, communities, and workplaces could be like if we made this one small change? What are the possibilities that we would open up? How much angst could we save ourselves and others by making this one simple change: Ask for what we want without attacking, blaming, or criticizing?

How Do You Define Trust?

January 19, 2014

I have found that trust is hard to define and everyone has a different concept of what it is and how you build or break it. I am just revising my definition of Trust for the upcoming book, High Performance Relationships, because of this lack of clarity. I actually think that there is something more core and basic than trust, and that is Psychological Safety. So, here’s my definition:

“Trust develops over time and is an outcome of having ongoing experiences of feeling safe with others. Safety is easier to control than trust. Safety can be breached or bridged in the moment to moment interactions we have with others.”

In my work with teams and couples, I have observed that trust usually takes awhile to build or break down. I have found that when I talk with leaders and teams about the idea of psychological safety, it resonates with them and often links with their physical “Safety First” culture. Safety is also easier to notice and shift quickly in a conversation by using “Safety Tools” like paraphrasing, asking for clarification, demonstrating empathy, summarizing, apologizing, etc. What do you think? How do you define and demonstrate trust in your life and relationships at work and home?